Being a mother.......

I've always thought of my duty as a mom is to love, nurture, and make sure my son survives. Only did it just now hit me that my son is going to see me in the same light I see my own mother. What a overwhelming responsibility. Already at 9 months my son comes {crawling} to me anytime he gets upset and/or needs help. As an adult, I still go {running} to my own mother for advice and guidance. I'm overly blessed with the opportunity to be a mother, but I stress that I will be intelligent and responsible enough to give him {and future children} the guidance needed for the future, in which is approaching far faster than I ever imagined. 

My mother did a fabulous job raising me. Of course, like any life, there were a few speed bumps {which I like to call learning experiences} along the way. All in all she is the mother I hope to be. When I was young she helped me learn and grow. As an adult she helps me see the world as {unfortunately} it really  is and gives me advice from her own learning experiences. A quote from a TV show I watched with my mom has always stuck with me, "I hope I take the things my mother did as a mom and improve upon them." Isn't that the truth? That's out untimate goal, is it not?

I've said it before, if you would have asked me at 19 being a mom and wife was out of the picture. How I thank god for unanswered prayers. Being a mommy is more rewarding than it is hard. I find as my son grows older the harder it gets though. I'm sure this will continue to prove true. I will be the first to tell you the truth about parenthood. 

When he poops, more times than you'd think, it goes up his back, down his leg, on his feet, in your hands. All of this while wrestling the little nugget. Your goal is to simply get a clean diaper on without getting feces everywhere, or get him in tub as clean as possible. I now make a bottle before I make my morning coffee. Each night I wake up 1-4 {some nights more} times a nightl

 to a crying baby. I watch Mickey Mouse instead of the morning news. Even now, I'm trying to write a blog post while my son is climbing on me begging for attention. 

However, when I'm feeling sad and lost all it takes is his little grin to brighten my mood. No matter how many times in a row he says "mama" it never gets old. His needs come before mine, and being needed like that is incredibly hard to describe. As a mom, your child's life is far more precious than anything else, but suddenly there is this insane fear of dying before watching him grow into the man he one day will be. 

I have a lot of learning to do as a mother, and I plan to take the examples from my mom and my grandmother and improve upon them in my own mothering skills. I'm not a religious person, but I do pray. I pray, Lord help me along the way, give me the patience and knowledge it takes to be a mother. Bless that I can keep my family safe and free from the heartaches life tends to throw at us. I promise to do my best. Amen. 

Climbing at 7 am

Fresh out if the dryer blankie.